i’m sick to death of the female body being a moral battleground, or ultimate symbol of whole/mutilated, sacred/desecrated, hurting & healing. i’m sick of everything being so meaningful, a billboard for projection of every person’s desires and disgusts and insecurities, our own & each others, or the image for a flag held up by a movement. i live here. my body is a furry little animal that needs food and water & i’m gonna make sure she gets it
it is wild how women are people but we’re also supposed to be symbols and projects and metaphors and every bodily choice we make is Extremely Loaded and everyone gets to have opinions on everything we do
lesbian: [wants stimulus inside her vagina because it feels nice]
man: this means that she desires my flesh worm. my meat tube. my wrinkly urine-dispensing piss hose. enjoying tactile sensation in the same part of her body that i wish to shove my smegma wand into means that she finds my veiny cylinder sexually attractive
Seriously. Women say that and I just look at them like?… 🤔🤔🤔
Because it is?
I’ve been natural for almost 4 years and 90% of the time, I wish I could shave my head.
Every week after I wash my hair and decide I can’t be bothered to do a twistout and wake up to the realest shrinkage the next day and be standing in the mirror like ‘how ima style this’
😭 my hair is almost waist length and I still wake up looking like Florida Evans (I love her but goddamn, the shrinkage is mad disrespectful)
I just did my hair last night and was thinking about this post, like got damn this shit is hard and then I get criticized for protective styles…. Like DO YOU WANT TO DO MY HAIR BECAUSE I DONT!
I hate those “Why does your hair look like that?”, “You should do THIS to your hair” comments because last time I check nobody is in the bathroom with me when I’m detangling and steaming my hair
I feel like natural haired women are held up to a ridiculous standard by other naturals. Like, we have to always think positively of our hair and if we vocalize our frustration with our hair, they drag us for filth. Detangling is a headache, deep conditioning gets on my nerves and every wash day I must wake up before 9 because any time after that, I’m sure my hair will not dry till half of the next day is gone. I love my hair but shit it’s so much work.
Somebody finally said it!!!
But it’s always someone with a loose ass curl pattern or that can afford regular hair appointments with the attitude that anyone not constantly praising and loving up their hair is in the wrong. It takes me half a day to put braids in my hair and i work full time so it usually takes me a couple days to fully finish. It became a running thing at work to talk about how long it would take me when i finished and yet not a damn one volunteered to do them for me. Every time i cut my hair someone is telling me i shouldn’t and that my hair is so nice, and yet they not doing no upkeep, products are expensive and making my own is time consuming, but minding ya business is free and easily accessible.
3c/4a, close to tailbone length. I have fought off the desire to cut it off or give in to relaxing again so many times it’s not funny. Detangling takes me an entire day.
Natural hair aint easy. And people get mad if you want a break and to just flat iron it or wear some braids or something– or worse, compare you to natural women and act like you’re not brave enough to do what they are while you stare into the camera like on The Office.
There are people who literally can do their hair in 1-3 hours max. And I thought I could be like that if I just keep at it. No matter what I do, I can’t get into that time range. Washing, deep conditioning, styling and some of us pre-poo. These things are time consuming even if you have such a simple regimen…it also doesnt help that I have finer hair strands. And honestly the longer one’s hair get the longer the wash day. The easy wash/style days might only apply to looser hair naturals.
How long have you been natural and how long is your hair?
I went from 4 hours to 2 because I steam my hair.
I’ve been natural for some time but I started really taking care of my hair last year around late August early September. I had some set backs (heat damaged) and have been slowly cutting it off…almost all of it is gone by now. But between dealing with my scalp (dryness and itchiness) and my hair. I honestly don’t know what to do. I was told (not by a professional though) that steaming isnt good for high porosity hair…but I wonder if I should try it. Maybe steaming migjt help with my dryness, frizzy, and breakage from the single stand knots and tangles that my hair loves to give me.
Please try steaming your hair. I’ve been steaming my hair for almost a year and I wish I did it sooner because my hair would be down to my ankles by now if I knew better.
Thank you for the tip! I’m going to buy me a steamer. Make that my hair purchase for the year lol….Do you have a particular steamer that you use or does it matter what kind of steamer to use?
I buy a cheap $12 one from Walmart and I like it better than the $20 I used to buy from bed bath and beyond. You can’t miss it.
Thank you so much! Saved me money.
What’s the hair steamer called?
This is the one I use
Did you post a picture? I don’t see anything
This app acts up sometimes sooo I hope it’s showing now
✍🏽✍🏽✍🏽
what does a steamer do? It makes the hair easier to detangle?
Opens up your hair cuticles to absorb more moisture - it’s bomb for low porosity folks and people who suffer from dryness.
My edges have been so weak because of the chemical burns I used to get from past relaxers, so I use The Chubby Afro oil (look on Etsy, don’t google it cuz a bunch of porn sites will pop up) and my edges have been flourishing a lot because I steam my edges for a few secs and then apply the oil.
I was literally about to drop $78 on the Q-Redew🤦🏽♀️ bless this post!🙌🏾
Lol anyone that bought the Q Redew got scammed 😂
I bought the Walmart steamer and burnt my finger from the steam pretty bad so I haven’t touched it sense. I still want the qredew bc I can hold it without getting burned.
Sorry that happened to you! But they’re steamers … there’s always a risk of getting burn or hurt because of the boiling, hot water.
Still think it’s worth a try because not everyone have $60+ to spend on a appliance.
So like do you sit in front of the steamer? Do you put an attachment on your head? What does wash day look like for y’all cause I think I’m doing this natural thing wrong..
I literally pick up the steamer (not too close tho) and let the hot air hit my strands. Only for a few secs because the deep conditioner that I use makes my hair soft already but the heat from the steam makes my hair manageable and easy to brush out without breaking my hair. It takes me 30 mins because I have crazy shrinkage and I have to do small sections or else I’ll be breaking my hair.
So glad I found this!
….edges. Goddamned motherfucking edges. Mine aren’t slick. My hair is too thick, and I will be damned if I get patches or lose my hairline because bitches wanna judge my friggin baby hairs. But if I can smooth them and soften them with this and not gel I will give it a try.
Honestly, just use extra leave in conditioner or a hair buttercream to smooth and soften them. That’s what I do.
I don’t slick my edges down either.
@jehovahhthickness I use those, but the kink is strong and I’d like to see what happens with this steam situation
All steaming does (if you’re low porosity like me) is to open your hair cuticles and allow moisture in so maybe it will help 🤷🏿♀️
Listen, @jehovahhthickness your steamer tip has to be one of the greatest tips I’ve gotten since going natural. Thanks
I wouldn’t steer y’all into the wrong direction 🤗
Listen i was down to collar bone length 3b/3c and i cut all my hair off LOL. I lasted like a year or so natural
It takes a lot of effort to be natural.
Being natural is for everyone but to maintain it is not everyone’s cup of tea.
Thank you for the tips!!! I’m 4c low porosity and I HATE detangling my hair. Also have dry scalp and haven’t nailed down the right oil to help it.
I love my hair so much and can’t imagine perming it ever again but gid fucking damn do I sometimes feel like shaving it off. It takes me 6 hours and 30 minutes to do my hair on every freaking wash day. Wash day is the reason why I refuse to always wear my hair out. I can only tolerate wearing my afro out for four months at a time. Even on days when I don’t have classes I don’t feel like dealing with my hair, its been three days and I still haven’t moisturized my hair yet.
I keep telling y’all to just try steaming your hair and you will see a huge difference.
Plus, it should not take more than 2 hours to do a complete wash day (from shampooing to styling)
do you ever get so annoyed at everything that you start to get pissed off at even little things like a spoon clinking against a bowl or sounds of people talking
I think it’s called sensory overload. It’s really common in people with anxiety
it can also be a result of sleep deprivation, stress, or ever dehydration !!